What’s My Yes Here?

Sunday morning. Me, the dog, and Eleanor. Round two.

It didn’t begin well. “You nnnnneeeeevvvver take me with you when you exercise!” Not true. Remember this? Apparently that was so four weeks ago, it no longer counted.

Then, it got a little bit better. “Mom! I’m going to ride my bike!” hhhhmmm. This just might work.

I hadn’t taken the fuzzy wuzzy into account.



Or the fallen maple leaves. Or the fallen fruit from the apple tree. Or the need to stop, discuss, and document them all. Then there was the speeding ahead, turning in circles, suddenly breaking. Riding right up next to me. Riding right up behind the dog (it’s a good thing she doesn’t have a long tail).

It wasn’t how I had planned the morning. Eleanor at my side wasn’t one of the details I had in my mind. It shifted the checks on my to-do list.

  • spend time outside? check
  • get the dog out? check
  • exercise? more-or-less check
  • meditative quiet time? not-so-much check
  • connect with Eleanor? bonus check
I stopped when I didn’t want to. I ran in places I’d prefer to walk. But we laughed. And looked. And I was so glad to have said yes. Yes, ride your bike and come with me. (and yes, I also promised myself the quiet time would be squeezed in to another point in the day).
ignore the details

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When our children ask for something we didn’t consider, setting aside the details to see the agenda points can clear our view. What is my yes here? Or, instead of replying with a no, can it be met with a yes?

  • Yes, more ice cream sounds delicious! I can’t wait for us to share sometomorrow night after dinner.
  • Yes, I can play trucks with you. Let’s set the timer for 5 minutes and then I will be ready.
  • Yes, let’s get that pair of jeans for you, once we’ve figured out what you can do to earn your part.
The boundary may be the same — we’ve already had enough dessert, I’m in the middle of something and can’t get to you right now, I’m not spending that much money for jeans–but we can reach that boundary through a yes.

When have you had a day totally change because you said yes? Or how have you side-stepped a no by using a different way to say your same boundary? We each have a story. I’d love to hear yours.

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